Me: Bear, I know you have a lot of energy but you need to find something else to do.
Bear: (Continuing to bump my leg with his nose, as he has been doing since about 5:30) Ok
Me: Bear! Stop! Go find something to do!
Bear: (Wonders off)
Me: (Looks up a few minutes later) Bear! Stop! (Rescuing spinning fiber, drop spindle and wrist distaff from Bear)
Bear: (Sits in front of me and gets very close to a puppy glare) What?
Me: Let me rephrase, find something to do that doesn't involve annoying me or causing damage to anything not on the approved list.
Bear: And what exactly would that be?
Me: (Thinks for a few seconds) oh I know, you need to go outside and play with Rommie!
Tug of War!
Me: (Holding the squeaky elephant toy) Hey Bear! Want to play?
Bear: (Running out of the kitchen) Yeah! (Grabs end of elephant ear and lays down)
Me: Really? This is how you play tug-of-war?
Bear: (Starts backing up slowly low to the ground)
Me: Oh it was a trick! (pulls back on toy)
Toy: (SQUEAK)
Bear: (Drops toy and looks at me) Mother! That is not how you are supposed to squeak the toy.
Me: C'mon Bear, let's play! (Holding out toy)
Bear: (Grabs toy and pulls backwards)
Toy: (SQUEAK)
Bear: (Freezes, looks at me for a second. Starts inching down the toy with his mouth until he gets the elephant head in his mouth. Puts paw next to my hand and pushes until I let go)
Me: You don't want to play anymore?
Bear: (Lays down with his back to me starts squeaking the toy the "right" way) (mumbling) silly Mom, that is not how you squeak the toy!
Next Afternoon
Me: (Holding the squeaky elephant toy) Hey Bear! Want to play?
Sneezes
Me: (Feels the start of a sneezing attack)
Bear: (Running from the back room) Mother! Did you hear that noise???
Me: (Sneeze)
Bear: (Looking at me oddly) Mother! Are you going to die????
Me: (Sneeze) No (Sneeze)
Bear: (Puts his front paws in my lap and stands nose to nose with me)
Me: Bear! (Sneezing off to the side to keep from bumping heads)
Bear: Mother! (Puts nose on mine) You need to stop that!
Me: (Sneeze, sneeze)
Bear: Mother! I said stop!
Me: (Sneeze) Bear, it's not like I can control it.
Bear: (Pushes nose against mine) Mom! Don't die!
Me: (Laughing, sneeze) Sweetie, sneezes aren't fatal
Bear: Oh good (Hops off my lap and heads back to his room)