Tag Archive: toys


The Toy!

Normal day in my life:

I open the bathroom door, Bear carpet in place across threshold guarding door, Tramp sitting a few feet back monitoring door for any unusual activity. Both dogs look at me, Bear hops up, both head to the living room.

Day one of my not normal days:

I open the bathroom door, no Bear carpet. No Tramp. I walk into the living room, see Bear sitting in front of the couch looking at the fireplace. Tramp, sitting on the couch, looking at the front door. All seems to be fine until I see Rommie, she is glaring at me. Suddenly I realize The Toy, check on my bed where this treasured toy resides and it’s gone.

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Before I go on with this story I will explain. The Toy is Rommie’s toy. She isn’t a dog that plays with toys very much but she loves this toy because my daughter gave her this toy, she sleeps with it every night like a pillow. It was a gift and it’s hers. This also makes this Toy the hottest commodity in the house.

I head to Bear’s kennel and find The Toy in the back corner (of course). Once I have captured the toy, crawled back out of Bear’s kennel through Bear and gotten back to my bedroom surviving all manner of attempts to stop me I put The Toy up on the shelf for the rest of the day.

Day Two of my not normal days:

I open the bathroom door, Bear carpet, more than a little crooked across the threshold, no Tramp. Bear jumps up and heads directly for his kennel. I look at the bed and notice a missing Toy. I walk out of the bedroom to a glaring Rommie. When I get to Bears kennel I see a corner of The Toy peaking out from under one of his blankets. I climb back in his kennel rescue The Toy and put it up for the day.

Day Three of my not normal days:

I open the bathroom door, Bear carpet back in place, Tramp watching the door, all is good. I walk into the living room and Rommie glares at me. Yup, toy is gone, the boys are getting good.

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My morning ritual now includes putting The Toy up. If I manage to forget, Bear invites me into his kennel to retrieve the toy, Rommie makes sure I do.

A weak mommy moment

Bear: (Spends evening covering living room with fluff.)
Me: Bedtime! (Kennels Bear and Tramp, gives bedtime treats, head back to living room and clean up fluff and toys)

Next morning

Me: (Lets boys out of kennels, fakes cheerful voice) Good morning Boys
Bear: Hi Mom!
Tramp: Yeah right.
Bear: (Trotting down hallway, turns corner to living room, stops in his tracks) Whoa, what happened?
Me: Keep going Bear, time to go out!
Bear: The fluff! All my fluff is gone! I worked on that all night long!
Tramp: Dude, grumbling at Mom first thing in the morning? Bad idea.
Me: No kidding, the kettle hasn’t even started warming the water yet.
Bear: Mother, we need to talk about this when I get back.
Me: Go for it. (Locking door, wondering if it duct tape would seal it permanently)

Bear: (Hits door handle a little while later to be let in)
Me: (Opens door )
Bear: (Sits in front of me with stern puppy look) Mother, I worked all night long to get all of the fluff just how I wanted it in the living room. I was looking forward to playing with it today.
Me: (Gives up trying to hide smile and covers face with hands) Oh baby Bear I’m so sorry. (Sits down in front of Bear) I didn’t realize you had done that on purpose you didn’t tell me. I must have had a weak mommy moment and cleaned the living room. I am so sorry! (Acts very upset, hands still covering face)

Everyone is very quiet.

Tramp: (Jumps in my lap and starts licking my chin)
Lady: I’m pretty sure she’s faking
Rommie: I am so not getting involved.
Bear: Um Mom, it’s ok, (bumps my hands with nose) I’m not mad, I should have told you. Mom?
Me: So you’re not mad? (I mumble through my hands)
Bear: Nope, not mad
Me: (Grabs Bear in hug) I want a Bear Kiss!
Bear: (Wiggles out of my reach) Mother! You were faking!
Me: Of course I was, a weak mommy moment? Really?
Bear: That is so not fair! (Stalks off to his kennel)

I’m sure that’s a toy

Bear is chewing on a blue plastic thing. 
I’m pretty sure it used to be part of a larger dog toy. 
Mostly sure. 
I think it was. 
I’m pretty sure if it wasn’t, it’s not something I will be upset about if it breaks. 
There. 
I’m good. 
Bear’s a good boy!

Housework in my world

And this is why anything housecleaning related takes twice as long:

Me: It’s Thursday night!
Bear: And?
Me: We get to clean up the living room! I get to see the floor again!
Bear: No!!! That isn’t fair! I don’t like it when you move my toys.
Me: Right, One day a week I get a clean living room. Deal with it.
Bear: (Notices plastic bag in my hand) Mother, what is THAT for?
Me: Fluff, shredded boxes and various toy body parts that are no longer attached
Bear: (Giving me a horrified look) What are you going to do with it?
Me: Why don’t you go out. Are you sure the backyard is still there?
Bear: Out! I need to go out!
Me: (Quickly picking up all the previously listed items and putting them in trash)
Bear: (Banging door handle after confirming location of backyard)
Me: (Letting him back in) Ok, ready to pick up all the toys?
Bear: (Wilts) If we have to.
Me: (Picks up dog bed, carries it back to boys room, drops it inside the door)
Bear: (Follows me, picks dog bed up, brings it back to living room drops in exact same spot)
Me: Bear, this isn’t going to work if you bring everything back.
Bear: Ok Mom
Me: (Picks up dog bed, carries it back to boys room, drops it inside the door)
Bear: (Follows me, picks dog bed up, brings it back to living room drops in exact same spot)
Me: Bear.
Bear: What?
Me: One more time and leave the dog bed in your room this time.
Bear: (Looks at me)
Me: Right (Picks up dog bed, carries it back to boys room, drops it inside the door)
Bear: (Follows me, picks dog bed up, brings it back to living room drops bed and stands on it)
Me: Ok, time for something different. (Picks up Bears empty toy box and starts picking up toys, filling the toy box)
Bear: (Still standing on bed) Wait! Don’t move those!
Me: (Gets last toy picked up and squished into toy box. Looks at Bear)
Bear: (Comes over to make sure all of his toys are safe.)
Me: (Walks towards boys room, grabs dog bed off the floor, stacks it on top of the top box and drops the whole thing in the boys room.)
Bear: Mother!!!!!!!
Me: (Quickly turns on vacuum)
Bear: Wait! I have to go protect my toys! (Runs to back room until the monster is done making noise)
Me: Oh look a clean living room 🙂

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