Me: (Hears something plastic being pushed, dropped and rolled down the hallway) Bear, should I ask what you are doing or just wait until you get here?
Bear: (Stops making noise) Mom! My food dish is EMPTY!
Me: The one in your kennel you dumped out this morning?
Bear: Yes! It's empty!
Me: That generally happens when you upend your bowl.
Bear: Mother! I'm hungry! I need more food.
Me: Bear, you have better than half a bag of food in and around your kennel because you turn your dish upside down every time I fill it up.
Bear: So?
Me: So, eat the food in and around your kennel.
Bear: But it's dirty!
Me: Really? You want to go there?
Bear: SIGH
Gravity
Bear: Mom!!! (Jumping into my lap while I'm sitting in the recliner)
Tramp: Mom!! (Landing on the one spot on my leg Bear hasn't taken over)
Me: Bear, good grief you are getting heavy. (Struggling to move the rather heavy and wiggly puppy to a less painful place in the recliner)
Bear: Put the leg thing up!
Tramp: Yeah! We can all fit then
Me: (Raising the leg rest) Just be careful, it won't hold you up if you get on the end of it.
Bear: Sure it will, we've done this lots!
Tramp: (Stretching out against my leg)
Bear: (Lays down on the other side of tramp and notices Betsy on the floor)
Me: Bear, the leg rest won't hold you up if you scoot out much more.
Bear: (Crawling out to the end of the leg rest to look over at Betsy) See Mom it's fine!
Me: (Feeling the leg rest start to move) Sure Sweetie…
Bear:(Stands up quickly)
The leg rest folds, Tramp and Bear go flying off the recliner. The leg rest pops back up.
Bear: Mother! You did that on purpose!
Tramp: Yeah! That's not fair!!!
Me: (Laughing) And I suppose it's my fault you are getting so big.
Bear: Yes! I don't think I'm going to sit with you again
Tramp: Yeah right, I'm snuggling with Mom. (Hops back up next to me leg and lays down)
Bear: Wait! I get to sit with Mom too! (Jumps back on the chair and plops down, causing the leg rest to fold again…)
Coffee Bear
Me: (Walking back to the recliner to find Bear sitting very still in the chair)
Bear: (Quickly getting down)
Me: (Looking around and noticing several black hair on the inside rim of my coffee cup) Bear, did you drink my coffee?
Bear: uhh Nope
Me: Are you sure? I don't remember seeing black hair in it before.
Bear: Nope, I wouldn't drink your stuff!
Me: (taking the cup to the kitchen to pour it out and get a new one.)
Several seconds pass
Bear: Mom? Why would you drink something that tastes that bad?
Me: (grinning now) With the single exception of Rachel's crazy dog, none of you furbabies like it so I generally don't end up having get new drinks all the time. Besides, I like the flavor.
Bear: (Wrinkles his nose)
Me: Bear? How do you know it tastes bad if you didn't drink out of my cup?
Bear: (Freezes for a second then launches at me) Bear Kisses!!!! You need Bear Kisses!!!!
Encouragement
Tramp: Mom! Bear is stealing my blankets!
Me: (Walking into the room with their kennels) Bear?
Bear: (Dragging Tramp’s blankets into his kennel) What?
Me: What are you doing?
Bear: I want more blankets
Me: Two towels, one sheet and a blanket isn’t enough?
Bear: No!
Me: Wait, how exactly did you get his blankets, he has a small kennel.
Bear: Like this (Squeezes into the kennel designed for dogs up to 20 pounds, “turns around” and comes back out, head first)
Me: Wow, I’m impressed, how on earth did you turn around in there?
Tramp: MOTHER, Do NOT encourage him!
Me: Right, like it’s going to make a difference in what he does.
Bear: So can I keep the blankets?
Tramp: NO
Me: No, but if you want I will wash all of yours so they will be clean and warm tonight
Bear: (Launches into his kennel) No!!!!!!!
Tramp: (Grabs his blanket and drags it back to his kennel mumbling)
Gravity Works
Bear: (Climbing onto the recliner with me carrying the Christmas puppy toy that barks.)
Me: (Squeezing the dog to start it barking) Sweetie, don’t drop the toy
Bear: Ok Mom (drops the toy)
Me: (Leaning down to get the toy) Bear, I just told you to not drop the toy
Bear: (Taking the toy back) Sorry Mom (Drops the toy on top of Betsy) Mom! Betsy took my toy!
Betsy: Really??
Me: (Reaching down to pick the toy up off Betsy’s shoulder) Bear, one more time and you are following the toy.
Bear: Mom, that’s no fair! (Turns his head so it looks like he dropped it again)
Me: (Leaning down to make sure the toy didn’t hit Betsy)
Bear: (Holding the toy by the tip of one of the antlers) Ha Mom! I fooled you. (Drops toy) Uh-oh.
Starving with Puppy Food
Bear: (Carrying one of the food dishes) Mom!!! Betsy ate all the food, I’m starving to death!!!
Me: Starving? Really??
Bear: (Shaking food dish, then drops it) Yes! It’s empty!
Me: Did you by any chance notice the other 3 mostly full food dishes?
Bear: No! This is MY dish and Betsy ate all my food!
Me: Tell me again when this became your food dish? I could have sworn the one in your kennel with the puppy food was yours.
Bear: Yuck! I hate puppy food!
Me: I noticed.
Bear: (Picks up food dish and drops it again) Mom! Starving here!!
Me: Why don’t you go kennel so you can eat?
Bear: Mom!!!
Me: Bear!!!
Bear: (Grumbles) I don’t know why you make me eat the puppy food anyway, I’m a big boy!
Betsy: Puppy food? Where?? I want puppy food!!
Bear: No way Betsy! That’s MY food, you can’t have any!!! (Runs to kennel) Mom, hurry up and let me in!
Snowtrill's Space 